I enjoy obscure words such as 'moist' and 'succulent' and practise the art of platonic friction (as opposed to intimate friction). I worship the Lord and saviour Spaghetti Monster and am a fan of Relatively random Capatalisation. My passtimes include Tasting the Rainbow, twanging my guitar strings, and moving my legs in a manner that will make me swiftly arrive at my unspecified destination. I also enjoy contemplating the inevitability of death, and my favourite sight is the red blood slowly seeping out of my enemies' vital organs.
As mentioned previously, I dabble in the arts of platonic friction, and I am quite fond of Tasting the Rainbow, twanging my guitar strings, and jogging quite swiftly. By far my favourite hobby of all, however, is gently stroking my pet canine. He goes by the names of 'Pepper', 'Doctor Pepper', 'Pepsi', 'Pupper', 'Pupsi', 'Pupperoni', and 'Pupperoni Pizza'. He is coloured onyx and ashen, and he is bred for violently chasing cattle for the purpose of herding them to a particular location where they will be either milked or slaughtered.
Life, the Universe, and Everything
I own many material objects, some of the most prominent being my bed, my e-reader, and my multiple stringed racquet used for playing a sport known as 'tennis' by the general public. My bed is my favorite place to go to contemplate life and death and everything in between, and it is a place of comfort from my darkest nightmares. The bedsheets form an interesting floral pattern which reminds me of the overpowering force we call nature, and I sometimes like to reflect upon my life mistakes upon these very bedsheets. My e-reader is an electronic device upon which I enjoy reading fictional novels that entertain me with the idea that life is a lie. Finally, my tennis racquet hits the sturdiest of shots into my opponent's court and my racquet and I watch as they cower in fear.
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